Yoga Farts
Even as a Yoga newbie, I have observed that farts happen during classes. I suspect that this is a normal enough occurrence although it is not mentioned in video tapes, DVD’s, or the plethora of books on practicing Yoga.
I checked the index of the Yoga Bible(1) for gas, flatulence, fart, and oopsies but found nothing. So what is a person to do?
I’ll admit that I have released a fartlet or two. Others have made a mightier impact and then excused themselves. It is for those that I am exploring the problem and solutions.
We are addressing a very natural function. My cat doesn’t seem to notice when she waxes gaseous although I do. Children revel in the sounds and odors of farts and find the process hilarious.
In March 2009 a Lakeland Florida, eight-grader produced a momentous effect that increased his status with his peers while riding the school bus. His bus driver was not amused, claiming the result was noxious and made breathing difficult. The student was banned from riding the bus.
Many people don’t grow out of this stage. Benjamin Franklin showed his cheekier side in a letter he wrote requesting finding ways to make farts smell better. The epistle was mocking the pretensions of various European academic societies. This letter can be found in a collection of Franklin’s better works titled Fart Proudly(2).
It may be presumptuous of me to address this matter, but since the literature on the matter is scarce, I’ll just do it.
One item that Yoga books do address is that is preferable to not eat before class. Practice will not be enjoyable with a lot of stuff in your gut. Plus this will increase the probability of farts but the authors are silent on this.
Poses can involve twisting internal organs, and we have little control over the direction of travel of gas bubbles. And, the poses can lead to a new level of relaxation and the fart will slip out with no warning. So my take is that they can and will happen.
I suppose one could apologize for the resulting noise. But, that can disrupt the class and draw attention from those who are unaware of the incident. If you must say something, perhaps a sotto voce woops will suffice. Or, you can issue a huge sigh and pretend that it was your intention all along.
Some actions I advise against either for the farter or fartees. You should not ask loudly, “Who died?” You should not grab your throat and fall to the floor, even if you claim to be doing a variation of the corpse pose.
I think that doing nothing is the best approach. Most of us students are too intent with our own practice to care.
Remember that your body is your temple and its effluvium is incense.
And when the event occurs, just continue along. You are not alone.
notes
in category East Green Random Notes
